only GURU

Hi there…. Well u see… after long research I found out that, the big companies really don consider our resume if one is not from a great coll. So then I came out with kick back formula of the resume they expect. This is the perfect resume and I shall call it the Mona Lisa of Resume. This is dedicated to all those people who ask us to apply for a post even though they are not ready to consider it. Either its used as a rough paper or worse… carry ur imagination. With this resume I wanna just tell one thing to them,” All you executives sitting in the Air-conditioned cabin and doing no real help, U are all idiots. And I dedicate this to u”.

CURRICULAM-VITAE

SHUBHAM ROYCHOUDHURY

10-500/56,

590 Avenue

16^th Main, Manhattan,

New York,

USA

Ph no: All lines are Busy

Mobile: +1-500-986-420

Email: feedback@ndtv.com

OBJECTIVE:

To buy Microsoft and sell it to Yahoo for one third the prize. Why

should yahoo face humiliations and acquisition threats.

PROFESSIONAL STRNGTH:

I Drink, Booze, Huff Grass. Thus the perfect candidate

EDUCATION QUALIFICATION:

S.No	Qualification	University/ Board	Year of PASSING????	% of marks
1	B.Tech Mechanical Engineering	OXFORD UNIVERSITY. May be in UK or US, Can’t exactly remember	Still Alive	NA
2	Intermediate	Stanford university US	Still Alive	NA
3	S.S.E	Cambridge School UK	Still Alive	NA

TECHNICAL SKILLS

OPERATING SYSTEMS	Windows, Doors and some time Balcony
LANGUAGES	Hindi, English, Tamil, Japanese, Bengali
INTERNET TECHNOLOGIES	Internet explorer, Mozilla firefox
DATABASES	Full data, so no base
OTHER PACKAGES	BSNL 750+

EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITY:

All kinds of activities, if u can get my drift that is!!!!!!!

Acquired Wipro in the year 2007

Acquired TCS as Birthday Gift

Planning to Buy Infy…

Well!!!!!!!! I don consider CTS as a company dude…..

PERSONAL PROFILE:

Don’t you have PAW KILO shame. Dint your parents

teach you not to ask other’s personal data.

Declaration:

I hereby declare that all the above lines and

information are true to my extreme knowledge

Signed

Shubham RoyChoudhury

Tech GURU---iPhone

Ya… now the avatar I m taking is the “Gadget Guru”. This one is dedicated to all enduring “iPhone”. Now isn’t this a masterpiece??? Though I m really sad that I don own one and staying in a country like India, the private telecom services have made it even more tough to get it. The real dream of any techno savvy, its being offered for more than three times the prize they pay in US. Man… and they call us Developing county. Anyways, back to the incredible.

Sleek, Beautiful, attractive, sleazy, gorgeous, sexy, affordable and loaded with features, all the qualities that a man desires in a woman. Well u can’t find them anywhere but in this. Sorry pals. Fate!!!!!!!! A must buy (that is when someone of your relatives agrees to import it to u). with all the regular features of a regular mobile and all the other features of an ipod it still has so much place in it that it has many more features. The new super cool technique of web browsing called the safari is loaded in this. And with 3G and Wi-Fi, you can browse the real Internet really fast. One can also watch all the youtube videos in that. With a built-in camera and an advanced photo application, iPhone is the most photo-friendly phone ever. It takes snapshots, automatically syncs photos with your PC or Mac, displays albums with the flick of a finger. With its beautiful 3.5-inch widescreen display and Multi-Touch controls, iPhone is also one amazing iPod. 3G technology gives iPhone fast access to the Internet and email over cellular networks around the world. iPhone 3G also makes it possible to do more in more places: Surf the web, download email, get directions, and watch video — even while you’re on a call. What else does one need.

But there are some features that are missing in this mobile that may really hamper its sale in India. And that is the FWD option in the sms. Guess the iPhone ppl din kno that this is the thing that is the hot favorite among us. Jokes apart, yet another application that one might miss, is that of a Bluetooth. That means one cannot transfer photos from one cell to another. But, when u have so many positives, hardly anyone is gonna notice on the other side.

The Criticaal Guru

Today, the Guru is going to talk about the latest movie that rolled out of the Pixar Animation Studios, WALL-E. First lets all remember what other movies they had taken and then u would understand the actual greatness of the movie. They started their first production with the movie Toy Story. And from there, there was no stopping them. Then came its sequel Toy Story 2, A Bug’s life, Monsters, Inc., Finding Nemo and so on. Each movie was great in its own way. One movie was about the relationship between a father and a son and then the love for innocence of a child in Monster’s. But here in Wall-E, they have excelled themselves in all fields of human emotions, from love for a person to love for all humanity.

The movie is a treat to watch. The screenplay is awesome and everything is so metaphoric that u start pondering if this movie is about our very life that we are living. Mr. WALL-E (Waste Allocation Load Lifter Earth-Class) is a robot who is the only robot left behind on earth which has become a complete concrete jungle and does a very monotonous job of cleaning up the trash left by all the humans who are now enjoying a space cruiser vacation(Sounds so similar to our life na). Then he meets a lovely lady called EVE. Well, rest is as one says is history. The movie is definitely the best of its kind. The emotions and all characters action have been well defined and very natural. the thing with the movie is that it will make u fall in love over and over again, with everything. Once u come out of the theatre and ponder the movie you will start loving your bike, the plant that grows behind your house, the dog that is always standing outside your house, because one doesn’t miss something until its truly gone. This movie makes u think that way. One should go, and then u start thinking with whom to go. Well,

With your child.......................................................................... yes

With your parents..................................................................... yes

With your friends....................................................................... yes

With your girl friend.................................................................. yes

With your neighbor................................................................... yes

With some stranger................................................................... yes

Even if all the options are over,

then just all Alone........................................................ Hell yes!!!!!!!!

It’s The movie and one should not miss it.